HADITH THIRTY FOUR: YOU WILL BE WITH THE ONES YOU LOVE
A man asked, “O Messenger of Allah, what if a man loves a people but is not able to match their deeds?” The Messenger صلى الله عليه وسلم replied, «One will be with those whom they love.» When Anas I would narrate this hadith, he would say, “O Allah, we love you and love your Messenger.”
Reported by Ahmad (13388), al-Bukhari (6169), and Muslim (2640). Al-Bukhari (3688) reported that Anas said, “So, I love the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم, Abu Bakr, and ‘Umar. And I hope to be with them because of my love for them even though I did not do what they did.”
Commentary
If we love the righteous, we will be with them in Jannah. If we love what Allah loves and love in ways pleasing to Him, He will not separate us from our beloved on the Last Day.
With those that you love
When we love someone, we naturally want to be close to them. This takes different forms depending on whom we love. If it is familial love, we want to be around them to enjoy their company and make sure they are happy. When it is romantic love, we additionally desire physical intimacy with our spouses. At times, we can love friends as much as family, providing emotional outlets and companionship. Love is the magnet that brings us together.
Emotional and physical proximity lead to spiritual and intellectual proximity. It is the unconscious/conscious adoption of the ideas, character, and behavior of the one we love and spend time with. The more you love someone, the more you like what they say and do. This appreciation, coupled with length of exposure, leaves an imprint on us. We begin to have the same stories, same inside jokes, same experiences, same expressions, and similar ideas. The congruity between lovers, though not always complete, is evident when you scan families and couples to examine their outlook on life, major life plans, and convictions. Love not only brings us physically closer but spiritually and intellectually as well.
The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم announced in the Hadith the cohering effect of love. We are with those we love, he said, and it is so in many ways. When we admire someone, we tend to want to be like them and act like them. We usually copy and imitate those we love and admire. And it works in the other direction too: we tend to develop love and admiration for those that we imitate. Imitation brings the minds and bodies closer, and this, in turn, brings the hearts closer too. So, when the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said that we will be with those we love, he was right on many levels. People who love each other tend to get closer in heart, mind, and body. And as they were together on earth, they will be together on the Last Day. will be with those we love, he was right on many levels. People who love each other tend to get closer in heart, mind, and body. And as they were together on earth, they will be together on the Last Day.
Though the spirit of the Hadith is a glad tidings to the believers, it carries in it a warning too. You will be with those you love, the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said, no matter who they are. Ibn Hubayrah wrote commenting on this Hadith:
He [i.e. the Prophet] did not say that one will only be with the pious whom they love. Instead, he was not specific. Therefore, it is general and includes the pious and the impious.
Al-‘Ifsah (vol. 2, p. 73)
If loving the pious brings one closer to them and to Jannah, loving the impious brings one closer to them and to Hell. And getting closer to Hell is not where any of us wants to be. And herein lies the warning in the Hadith: whom you love matters. The kind of person you want to be in this world is determined largely by the loves of your life. Your inner circle is the people who inspire you and shape your thoughts and plans. They are the same people who will determine where you will be in the next life. If Jannah is your destination, you will love and surround yourself with the pious. But if the impious are our crowd, then our heart will belong to them. And as we choose to be with them here, we will join them on the Day of Judgment. As love makes us one with another on earth, it will do the same in the next life.
One clear inference from the Hadith is that we have to be selective in our love, that we have control over our love. This is why we end up in the next life with the ones we love, suggesting responsibility for our choice. We discussed previously that certain aspects of love may be out of our control. I do not control what physical features or personality type I find appealing. But these are not the only determinants of love, and I am not helpless in front of them. Higher loves—mainly the love of Allah—outweigh inferior loves/attractions and guide them. If I find myself attracted to someone who is utterly wrong for me, I do have the means to stem this love at its onset. Distance, contemplating the harms of this love, du‘a, and seeking better loves are all tools we can use to redirect our hearts. But allowing ourselves a second glance, striking a conversation, seeking them out, and thinking about them only feed our attraction.
We have options. We have tools that can channel our emotions towards the pleasure of Allah.
Another inference from the Hadith is about acquiring love for the ones Allah loves. When you admire the pious, your heart will be with them. If your heart is not there yet, you can develop your love for them. How? By thinking about the benefits that this love will bring you—including the heavenly reward—and keeping their company. Time, effort, and du‘a will bring their love to your heart. But when we find our hearts leaping towards the impious, we have to restrain them. Let me be honest. When we admire actors, singers, comedians, sports stars, and social media influencers and celebrities, who are we really admiring? The pious? Are they bringing us closer to Allah? Except for very few of them, what they do is displeasing to Allah. If we take them as our role models and idols, if we imitate them and fashion our lives after theirs, would that not be a sign of love? Would we not have willingly increased the love we have for them? And where is this going to put us on the Day of Judgment? With them, right? So, let us be honest with ourselves: do we want to be resurrected with them? If not, can we nurture love towards what Allah hates and still feel safe?
Loving the pious
The intentions, convictions, and attachments of the heart are its actions. They reflect the state of its Iman and wisdom, and are the basis for the actions of the body. Between the two, the actions of the heart are the more foundational and important (for more on this, see Hearth Therapy by the author). And none is more fundamental among the many actions of the heart than love. It is the basis for all other actions—internal and external—
and it is their natural conclusion. We possess all other emotions because we love, and they all carry us towards what we love. Love is the motivation and destination of all actions.
The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم distilled the reward of love in the Hadith. What do we gain when we love? The questioner in the Hadith saw that his actions were not up to the devotion of the righteous, yet he loved them. Will this love help? There may be a hint of
concern in the question at the possibility of separation from the beloved. If I love Allah and the Prophet, will I ever be separated from them? Will I be separated from the righteous? From my family? Every lover agonizes over the possibility of separation.
Now, if the distress was implicit in the Hadith of the chapter, it is not in the following hadith.
A man came to the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم and said, “O Messenger of Allah, I love you more than myself, I love you more than my family, and I love you more than my children. While I am at home, I remember you, and I cannot wait to come and see you. And when I think about my death and yours, I realize that when you enter Jannah, you will be raised with the Prophets. But if I enter Jannah, I fear that I may not see you.” So the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم did not reply until Jibril came down with this ayah, ﴾And
whoever obeys Allah and the Messenger will be with those whom Allah blessed: the Prophets and Siddiqs.﴿ [Al-Nisa’ 69]
Reported by al-Tabarani in al-Awsat (477) and al-Albani declared it hasan (al-Silsilah al-Sahihah, 2933)
First, let us give ourselves time to appreciate the question and the man who asked it. It is humbling to witness such intense love for the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم. We may think that we love the Prophet and that we are super Muslims, but this hadith reminds us how far we have to go before we are at a fraction of the piety of the Companions. May Allah forgive our shortcomings, arrogance, and self-admiration. What comforts the hearts, however, is the answer: the promise of always being with those whom we love. There is no separation and no anxiety if Allah loves you and He immerses you in His mercy. The joy of this Hadith must enter every believer’s heart. This was what happened with the Companions when they first heard it. Anas I said:
We used to like it when a Bedouin man would arrive and ask the Messenger صلى الله عليه وسلم. So, a nomad came and asked, “O Messenger of Allah, when will the Hour take place?” Then the Iqamah for the Salah was called, and the Messenger of Allah
prayed. When he finished his Salah, he asked, «Where is the one who asked about the Hour?» The man replied, “It is me, O Messenger of Allah.” He asked him, «What did you prepare for it?» He replied, “I did not prepare for it much praying or fasting except that I love Allah and His Messenger.” Upon this, the Messenger صلى الله عليه وسلم said, «One will be with those whom they love.» Anas said, “I did not witness the Muslims from the time they accepted Islam as happy with anything as they were when they heard this.”
Reported by Ahmad (12013) and al-Bukhari (6171)
They have not heard anything more promising since they accepted Islam. Loving Allah and His Prophet is a constant connection that all of us can have no matter how strong or
weak our practice is. And we should never let go of this love as long as we are alive.
In essence, loving the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم and the righteous is loving Allah. Not only is it a good deed, but it is also one of the best deeds that Allah loves. As was discussed, the goal of all of our worship is to inculcate Allah’s love in our hearts. When this love inhabits the heart, it transforms it. It fills it with content, generosity, and humility. Having this heart keeps us connected to Allah, even when our physical worship is modest. When the man informed the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم that he loved people with better deeds than his, he was explaining that he could not rise to the level of their devotion. But his heart was pious, happy with Allah, and close to Him. This internal devotion—love—is like a factory of good deeds that never stops running. And if one
keeps producing this love, they will join the righteous whom they love, even if they do not have the same physical deeds. The piety and devotion of the heart is the fastest way to the love of Allah. One with modest worship—performing only the obligations and avoiding the prohibitions—and a devoted heart surpasses by leaps and bounds one with a troubled heart and much more physical worship. The goal is not actions with an empty heart. The goal is a loving heart that produces heartfelt worship.
Will loving the righteous grant us their rank in Jannah? There are two possibilities. The first is that Allah—out of his immense generosity—will unite us in Jannah even if we have fewer good deeds than they do. Love for the pious compensates the shortcomings in physical worship. This helps us appreciate the value of love and how priceless the worship of the heart is. The other possibility is that loving the righteous keeps one close
to them, even if we are not at their very rank. So, those who love the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم will get closer and closer to him in Jannah, but no one will receive his exact rank. In either case, love is a remarkable vehicle to Jannah. It carries people to it, elevates them in it, and keeps them with their beloved. And the more intense and pure the love is, the higher one would go, getting closer and closer to whom they love.
It is highly recommended to love the righteous. Loving them means loving for Allah’s sake, loving because they are pleasing to Him. It means staying close to them to learn from them, emulating their righteousness, and making du‘a for them. And it must be done in ways pleasing to Allah. If one exaggerates their love (as discussed in Hadith Thirty Three), they will depart from Allah’s love and be denied the company of the very same people they claim to love. What we love and how we love may not always be pleasing to Allah. We must love what Allah loves, the way Allah loves it. We should seek the path that Allah loves and make it our own. And for that, we must learn what Allah loves.
DR. ALI ALBARGHOUTHI
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