HADITH NINE: ALLAH LOVES NOBLE MANNERS
HADITH NINE: ALLAH LOVES NOBLE MANNERS. The Messenger صلى الله عليه وسلم said, «The most beloved of people to Allah are the ones with the best character.»
Reported by Ibn Hibban (486) and al-Albani declared it sahih (al-Ta‘liqat al-Hisan, 486)
Commentary
Allah has the best Qualities, and He loves those with the best qualities. Allah loves the best for humanity, and good character is the vehicle for spreading happiness and wellbeing. This is why the good-mannered are beloved to Allah.
The excellence of good character
We, as an Ummah, are going through a deficit of manners. We have strayed in many ways from Allah, and our character reflects it. It would not be possible for us to behave so poorly if we knew Allah well, loved Him, and channelled this love into practice. What is ironic, and deeply sad, is that Islam places a high premium on good character. The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said:
«I was not sent but to complete honourable manners.»
Reported by al-Bukhari in al-Adab al-Mufrad (273) and al-Albani declared
it sahih (Sahih al-Adab al-Mufrad, 207)
We know that the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم reformed people’s beliefs and practices with Aqidah and law, so his message carried more than the call for a noble character. So, what does this hadith mean? We have two possibilities. The first is that it is a hyperbole.
There is such emphasis on developing good character in Islam that the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم made it as if it was his only task. This is a common rhetorical device in the Arabic language, and it was used in other hadiths. The second possibility is that good
character is much more than social behaviour. It encompasses our relationship with Allah, the beliefs we hold, and how these beliefs influence the rest of our life. Aqidah and law are part of this transformative message since they elevate and guide human understanding and practice. Therefore, good character is an umbrella term for all good behaviour, including worship and social conduct. In that sense, everything in Islam—including Aqidah and law—is about good character.
All this reflects the link between the worship of Allah and social relations. In the minds of many, unfortunately, the two are disconnected. We do not see how worshipping Allah (e.g. Salah, fasting, and Zakah) affects our mundane behaviour, and so they operate separately. This is why we hear complaints about the religious being deficient in manners (e.g. rude, harsh, argumentative, and unpunctual). On the one hand, it is unfair to generalise and give the impression that everyone who is religious is flawed in character. The Ummah is indeed running a character-deficit, and the religious are a product of their society, carrying the same ills as everyone else. It is also true that the religious—because of their appearance—represent Islam and are scrutinized more. Thus, they must strive to enhance their character, especially since worship is supposed to lead to greater kindness and mercy. When we hear that excellence in character was central to the mission of the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم, we understand that we are not truly following him until our manners improve. And this is not a trivial matter. The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said:
«Of the most beloved and nearest in position to me on the Day of Judgement are those with the best character. And of the most hated to me and furthest from me on the Day of Judgement are the babblers, the blowhards, and the mutafayhiqun.» They said, “We know the babblers and the blowhards. But who are the mutafayhiqun?” He answered, «The arrogant.»
Reported by al-Tirmidhi (2018) and al-Albani declared it sahih (Sahih al-Tirmidhi, 2018)
The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم was of great character, and it is natural for him to love those with similar beautiful traits. Acquiring and striving for good character is an act of worship in itself and it will bring one closest to the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم on the Last Day. So, if we genuinely love him and want him to love us back, and if we want to be near him and enjoy his company, the path passes through moral excellence. What is frightening about bad character is that it earns one the dislike of Allah and the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم. The three traits in the hadith are all about excessive, artificial, and
arrogant speech. Pride, showing off, and putting others down are the motives. When one speaks and they pretend to know, twist their tongue to seem more eloquent, and exaggerate to elevate themselves, they are committing a sin that Allah and His Prophet detest. If they had paid attention to their worship of Allah, it would have taught them humility, sincerity, and sensitivity not to hurt others. Worshipping Allah heals us and grants us calmer hearts, and this, in turn, leads to greater generosity. Competition for this world is the main cause of our quarrels. But if our worship lessens our attachment to this world, we will grow to be more courteous and forgiving. Bad character is a sign of internal conflict, deficiency, and corruption. This is why it distances one from Allah and His Messenger.
Good character, on the other hand, brings the love of Allah and people. It is in our nature to love those with beautiful character. Ali ibn Abi Talib said:
When one’s words are kind, loving them becomes a necessity.
Hayat al-Salaf bayna al-Qawl wa al-‘Amal (p. 321)
It is impossible not to love a kind person. The noble of character brings comfort and joy wherever they go. They assist others, suppress evil, and bring hope to desperate hearts. For all the good they bring to the people and the love they spread, Allah elevates them in Jannah. The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said:
«There is nothing heavier on the Scale than good character. Due to it, the one with good character reaches the level of the one with frequent praying and fasting.»
Reported by Abu Dawud (4799) and al-Tirmidhi (2003) and al-Albani declared it sahih (Sahih al-Tirmidhi, 2003)
It is an act of worship that lifts one all the way to the highest levels in Jannah. In fact, it is one of the main reasons people enter Heaven and Hell. The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said:
The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم was asked about the thing that most admits people to Jannah, to which he replied, «The taqwa of Allah and good character.» And he was asked about the thing that most admits people to Hell, to which he replied, «The mouth
and the private part.»
Reported by al-Tirmidhi (2004) and al-Albani declared it hasan (Sahih al-Tirmidhi, 2004)
If one relates to Allah with taqwa and to the people with nobility, they will be among the people of Jannah. But if they fail to restrain their mouth and private part—the basis of indecent and obnoxious behaviour—they will enter Hell. This is why it is crucial to strive to attain the best manners and to ask Allah for it. Umm al-Darda’ said:
Abu al-Darda’ I spent the night praying and crying and saying, “O Allah, You made my physical form beautiful, so make my character beautiful,” until the morning. I said, “O
Abu al-Darda’, your entire du‘a since the night was about good character!” He said, “O Umm al-Darda’, a Muslim’s character would be good until the beauty of their character admits them to Jannah. And their character would be bad until the ugliness of their character admits them to Hell.”
Hayat al-Salaf bayna al-Qawl wa al-‘Amal (p. 321)
When our manners change, our whole life will change. We will be more serene, we will have greater love for people and feel more of their love, and our hearts will feel closer to Allah. And we would be helping to rehabilitate the entire Ummah.
Why does Allah love good character?
Allah loves the happiness and wellbeing of His creation, and good character is the vehicle that spreads them. People, of course, help each other because they need each other. This need fuels the exchange of goods and services. But good manners move us to do more and to do it well. It moves us to give more than what we receive, to give even when we do not receive. It prompts us to fight selfishness, greed, and pride, and to strive to make others happy. When people receive the best, they will give back the best. This benevolence in time will uplift all of society, spreading love and comradery. And Allah loves this.
Good character is also a reflection of a life spent striving for Allah’s sake. We all have to struggle to attain, maintain, and cultivate good traits. We do this despite the resistance of a weak and greedy self, against the temptations of this world and whispers of Shaytan, and despite the harsh and disappointing daily interactions. Yet, the one who stays steadfast, they do so because of Allah, even if they are alone. Nobility is not about
who else is doing it. Many times, it requires resisting the pressure of the majority in society and never compromising your integrity. Good character is about pleasing Allah, every single day. And Allah loves those who strive to come closer to Him.
Finally, when good character is pursued for Allah’s sake, it reflects an appreciation of Allah’s Names and Attributes. Allah is Generous, Forgiving, Merciful, Concealer of mistakes, and Kind. And He loves to see these qualities among His creations. This is why He commands them and rewards them. When we know this, Allah’s Qualities will inspire us to adopt them on earth and come closer to Allah through them. If we want to get closer to the Merciful and to receive His Mercy, we should be merciful. If we wish to get closer to the Forgiving and receive His Forgiveness, we should be forgiving. If we want to get closer to the Generous, the Kind, and the Provider and to receive His
blessings, we should adopt these qualities and help everyone. When we do, we should remember that Allah does not want any benefit back from His creation for the good that He gives them. Similarly, we should give without expectations of a human reward. Our reward comes only from Allah. These are the manners that propel to the highest levels of Jannah and win us the love of Allah.
Adopting good character
Naturally, we would want to adorn ourselves with the best qualities to receive Allah’s love. Along this path, we will come to know what we possess and what we lack. Some of these qualities will be already in us (innate), and some will need to be acquired. The Messenger صلى الله عليه وسلم said to Ashajj Abd al-Qays:
«You have two qualities that Allah loves.» Ashajj Abd al-Qays asked, “What are they?” The Messenger صلى الله عليه وسلم replied, «Deliberation and haya’.» I asked, “Did I have them for a long time, or are they new?” He صلى الله عليه وسلم said, «You had them for a long time.» I said, “Praise and thanks be to Allah who created me with two qualities that He loves.”
Reported by Ahmad (18108) and Ibn Majah (4328) and al-Albani declared it sahih (Sahih Ibn Majah, 4188). Muslim (126) narrated it as (Deliberation and patience) instead of (Deliberation and haya’)
Each of us has a combination of good innate manners and others that we have adopted. Some are generous by nature, while others have to work on it. Some are patient, while others have anger problems. But even our innate good qualities need to be preserved, or else they will be disappear. And no matter what we already have, there is still more that we need to do. We are all on this lifelong path of pursuit and growth. On this path, we should take note of what Allah blessed us with and what we need to work on. We should preserve the gifts of Allah by thanking Him for our good qualities, attributing them to His Grace and not our virtue. We should further protect them by putting them into practice. As for what we lack, we begin by asking Allah for it. We need to read more about it, and we should try to adopt new habits gradually. We must not also
forget the influence of good company in elevating character. Finally, let us remember that our goal is the pleasure of Allah, not human gratitude or recognition. With du‘a and patience, we will change for the better insha-Allah.
Beautiful words and actions
This section presents some of the manners that Allah loves. The hadiths here can be thought of as suggested practical steps for change. These steps are gradual, making them the ideal starting point.
The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said:
«Indeed, Allah loves one who is lenient when they sell, lenient when they buy, and lenient with repayment of debt.»
Reported by al-Tirmidhi (1319) and al-Albani declared it sahih (Sahih al-Tirmidhi, 1319)
This person is easygoing and forgiving when they sell, buy, repay debt, and recollect debt. Their words are sweet, respectful, and honest; and they are generous and humble in action. Some, on the other hand, cause harm when they intend to purchase: they haggle and lower the price until the seller loses money, they buy with the intent of returning what they bought after using it, or return the merchandise damaged and demand a full refund. Sellers err when they raise their prices so it harms consumers,
when they monopolise the market to inflate prices, and when they sell defective goods. Both buyers and sellers stray away from Allah’s love when they are rude and disrespectful to each other. The last part of the hadith is about debt. If it is due, the debtor should pay it on time if they have the money. If they do not, the creditor should sympathise with their hardship and and allow delay in repayment or forgive the debt (or some of it) if they are rich.
The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said:
«There is jealousy that Allah loves and jealousy that Allah hates, and there is pride that Allah loves and pride that Allah hates. As for the jealousy that Allah loves, it is jealousy at the presence of something forbidden. As for the jealousy that Allah hates, it is jealousy without cause. And as for the pride that Allah loves, it is a man’s pride in battle and his pride when giving charity. And as for the pride that Allah hates, it is pride in aggression and boasting.»
Reported by Abu Dawud (2659) and al-Nasa‘i (2558). Al-Albani declared it hasan (Sahih Abi Dawud, 2659)
Allah loves that we be jealous when there are grounds for jealousy, when something wrong is taking place. This jealousy stems the prohibited acts that Allah hates and saves families from breaking up, conflict, and much heartache. Jealousy without reason breeds suspicion, hostility, and destroys families, something that Allah hates. Pride in battle is for one to display their strength and talent to frighten and discourage the enemy. Pride in charity is to be happy that Allah enabled them to give, and to keep giving with enthusiasm and delight. The pride that Allah hates is one that leads to injustice and aggression, when one feels that they are better than others.
The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said:
«Do not belittle any good deed, even if it is emptying from your bucket into the bucket of a seeker of water, and even if it is smiling while talking to your brother. And avoid making your clothes long, for this is from pride and Allah, glory be to Him, does not love pride. And if someone insults you using what they know about you, do not insult them back using what you know about them, for the reward of that exchange will be yours, and its sin will be on the one who said it.»
Reported by Abu Dawud (4084) and al-Albani declared it sahih (al-Silsilah
al-Sahihah, 1352)
These are a series of seemingly small actions, but the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم reminded us not to disregard any small act of righteousness. Small acts come together to form something big, and they become a habit that affects our behaviour and major decisions. So, whenever there is an opportunity to do something good, seize it and do not think that it is insignificant. The first act mentioned in the hadith is any little assistance you can offer. The second is cheerfulness when talking to people. The third is specific for men: lifting their garments above their ankles to protect themselves from arrogance. The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said:
«Indeed, Allah does not love those who wear long garments [i.e. below the ankles].»
Reported by Ibn Majah (2892) and al-Albani declared it hasan li-ghayrihi (Sahih al-Targhib, 2039)
It is such a small deed. But for those who love Allah, it is not small if Allah hates it. The last reminder is not to insult anyone. A Companion once asked the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم for advice. The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم told him:
«Do not insult anyone.» The man said, “So, I did not insult after him [giving me this advice] a freeman, a slave, a camel, or a sheep.”
Reported by Abu Dawud (4084) and al-Albani declared it sahih (al-Silsilah al-Sahihah, 1352)
These are the manners of Islam! Even animals are safe from our harm and from our tongue. And if someone uses what they know about you to put you down, do not do the same to them. If you suppress your anger and frustration and remain calm, Allah will reward you for your lofty manners, and your accuser will carry the sin.
We need a strong motive to embrace better manners. And there is nothing stronger than the promises Allah made us. He will reward us immensely, and we will be among the select on the Last Day. I know it is hard to change. But if we really want the Hereafter, will try our best. And if you do, Allah will assist you.
DR. ALI ALBARGHOUTHI
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