CHAPTER TWO: GRANDCHILDREN – PART 3
He, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, would kiss and hold his grandchildren:
Abu Hurayrah said that the Prophet of Allah, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, kissed Al-Hasan ibn ‘Ali when Al-Aqra’ ibn Haabis At-Tameemi was present. Al-Aqra said: “I have ten children, and I have never kissed any of them.” The Prophet of Allah, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, looked at him and said: “Whoever does not have mercy will not be shown mercy.” (Reported by Al-Bukhari (5997) and Muslim (2318).)
This answer to Al-Aqra’ shows that kissing one’s child is from the parent’s mercy, and likewise hugging or smelling them. (Fat-h Al-Baari (430/10).)
He, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, would hold them on his shoulders:
Abu Hurayrah narrated that the Prophet of Allah, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, came out carrying Al-Hasan and Al-Husayn on each shoulder, and he, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, would kiss each one of them. When he reached the people, a man remarked to him, “O Messenger of Allah, you love them!” The Prophet of Allah, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, replied: “Whoever loves them, then he loves me, and whoever hates them hates me.” (Reported by Ahmad (9381) and Ibn Maajah (143).)
If we were to compare the state of the Prophet of Allah, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, with his grandchildren to ourselves, we would discover the difference of attitude, as many people nowadays have abandoned raising and playing with their children and left them with servants, nannies or babysitters. Thus, the child grows up in the care of this “imitation mother” and he does not experience any love from his real parents.
The saliva of the children would fall on him but he, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, would not be annoyed:
Abu Hurayrah said: “I saw the Prophet of Allah, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, holding Al-Hasan ibn ‘Ali on his shoulder and he was drooling on him.” (Reported by Ibn Maajah (685).)
He, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, would allow them to ride with him on his mount
‘Abdullaah ibn Ja’far (a Companion) said: “Whenever the Prophet of Allah, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, returned from a journey, the children of his household would meet him. Once he returned and I was the first one, so he let me ride in front of him, and then one of the two sons of Faatimah came, so he put him behind him (on the riding animal.)” (Reported by Muslim (2428).)
Iyaas ibn Salamah narrated that his father said: “I led the Prophet of Allah, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, and Al-Hasan and Al-Husayn on his mule, until I brought them to the home of the Prophet of Allah, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, and one of them was behind him, and one in front of him.” (Reported by Muslim (2423).)
He, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, played with children and made them laugh:
Ya’la ibn Murrah (a Companion) narrated that some people went with the Prophet of Allah, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, to an invitation for dinner, and on the way they found Al-Husayn playing. So the Prophet of Allah, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, went ahead of the people and put his arms out, and Al-Husayn would run away laughing, until the Prophet of Allah, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, finally picked him up. He then put one of his hands on Al-Hasan’s chin, and the other on the back of his head and
then kissed him. Then he, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said: “Al-Husayn is from me, and I am from Al-Husayn, may Allah love whoever loves Al-Husayn, Al-Husayn is a nation on his own.“(Reported by Ibn Maajah (144) and At-Tirmidhi (3775).)
Al-Mubaarakpoori (a scholar) said:
“The words: “Husayn is from me, and I am from Al-Husayn” mean that they are connected in such a way that it could be said that each one is from the other.
The words: “Al-Husayn is a nation on his own:” i.e. in doing good deeds, or the meaning could be his many offspring will form tribes, so it is a reference that his many descendents will last, and they still exist until this day.” (Tuhfat Al-Ahwathi (178/10).)
He, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, would pray for mercy for them:
Usaamah ibn Zayd (a Companion) said that the Prophet of Allah, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, sat him and Al-Hasan on his two knees, then he, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, would hold them close to him and say: “O Allah, have mercy upon them, for I have mercy upon them.” (Reported by Al-Bukhari (6003).)
If he received any gifts, he, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, would give a portion to his relatives:
Since a gift has a great effect upon people, especially children, the Prophet of Allah, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, would give presents to his grandchildren. ‘Aa’ishah said: “The Najaashi (ruler of Ethiopia) sent some jewelry as a gift to the Prophet of Allah, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, and among it was a gold ring. The Prophet of Allah, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, picked it up with a stick keeping it away from him, or with his fingers. He, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, then called for Umaamah, his granddaughter from Zaynab and said to her: “Adorn yourself with it, my daughter.“” (Reported by Abu Dawood (4235) and Ibn Maajah (3644).)
He, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, raised them from their childhood to avoid impermissible things:
Abu Hurayrah narrated that Al-Hasan ibn ‘Ali took a date from some dates for charity and put it in his mouth, so the Prophet of Allah, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, made the sound: “Kakh, Kakh!” for him to spit it out. He, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, then said to him: “Didn’t you know that we do not eat from charity?” (Reported by Al-Bukhari (1419) and Muslim (1069).)
The narration shows that children should not do something that is prohibited upon adults, and this is the responsibility of the guardian. It also shows that they should be disciplined to do what benefits them, and to stay away from prohibited things that harm them, even though they are still not held responsible for it. (The explanation of An-Nawawi on the book of Muslim (175/7) and Fat-h Al-Baari (355/3).)
A child can be a cause of cowardice and stinginess
Ya’la Al-‘Aamiri (a Companion) narrated that Al-Hasan and Al-Husayn came running to the Prophet of Allah, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, so he hugged them both and said: “A child is a cause of cowardice and stinginess.” (Reported by Ibn Maajah (3656).)
As-Sindi (a scholar) said: “The meaning of this is that a person’s excessive love for his children could cause him to be stingy in giving charity, and to be cowardly and fearful of death because of them.” (Haashiyat As-Sindi (72/7).)
The narration also shows the exceeding love of the Prophet of Allah, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, for Al-Hasan and Al-Husayn when he hugged them and made this statement. Such was the Prophet’s nature when dealing with his grandchildren, and this was how he, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, would shower them with his mercy and compassion.
Conclusion:
Thus, we see that Prophet Muhammad, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, treated his children and grandchildren with great compassion and never neglected to direct them to the straight path and to good deeds. He, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, loved them and treated them tenderly, but did not allow them to neglect matters related to the afterlife. He, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, showed them how to lead a humane life and never allowed them to neglect their religious duties. His ultimate goal was to prepare them for the Hereafter.
His perfect balance in such matters is another dimension of his divinely inspired intellect. Prophet Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, was a human like us, but Allah inspired in him such an intimate affection for every living thing that he could establish a connection with all of them. As a result, he was full of extraordinary affection toward his family members and others.
Despite the fact that the Messenger of Allah, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, loved his children and grandchildren very much, he never let his love for them stand in the way of safeguarding them from going astray. He, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, taught them to be sensitive to forbidden acts early in their childhood and in doing so, established an important principle of education.
The Prophet did not shy away from showing his love and affection towards his daughters and granddaughters. This was not just an expression of his emotions, it was a vital and revolutionary social statement in a society where it had been the social norm to bury infants or young girls alive.
This was the relationship the Prophet of Allah, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, shared with his children and grandchildren, where he loved and cherished them and was loved and cherished by them in turn.
By Muhammad Saalih Al-Munajjid
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