18. DO NOT TRUST THE FRIENDLINESS OF ONE WHOM YOU HAVE HARMED
No one is more foolish than he who severely harms another person before apparently reconciling with one another, thinking that the harm done will go away because of this reconciliation. This is especially true about leaders and figures of authority because their main goal is to secure their position and for no one to surpass them. Once this happens it can never be remedied.
Look at the case of Abu Muslim al-Khurasanl. He belittled Al-Mansur before he became Khalifah, after becoming the Khalifah he killed him.
And he who reads history will find the same repeatedly occurring to many others.
He who humiliates a Sultan must try his best not to fall into his hands. Otherwise he will regret not being cautious enough. Similar to this is when colleagues harm one another— once they do, they should not wholly trust each other. They will always aim to harm each other and to con each other. Only accompany those whom you have been good to, for they only see your good side and will have good feelings towards you.
The same applies to your children, wife and others you deal with. In addition to this, you should never speak against someone or show animosity towards them.
It may be that one day you need them or they may become persons of authority and take revenge.
A wise man must plan for all possibilities and must conceal hatred (hughd) and love (wadd).
This is the advice that’s on my mind and I hope it is acceptable.
(Source: al-Hafiz Abu’l-Faraj ibn al-jawzl [d. 597AH] “CAPTURED THOUGHTS being” a translation of his masterpiece ‘Sayd al-K hatir)
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